why?

i fully intended to write something ground breaking, profound and smart today, but i am feeling generally lethargic. i am finding it extremely difficult to summon the will to think. i look around my immediate surroundings and i see everything in disarray my clothes and shoes lying in clumsy tangles around the floor and within me i know i ought to stand up and put things in order, but all i can make myself do is shrug and shuffle into a more comfortable position inside my pile of clean clothes i just got from the dry cleaners. i feel like someone just drained the life out of me.

so i ask myself why? why am i  feeling like this? why cant i shake this cancerous feeling of dissatisfaction that is growing larger in me everyday?

instead of answers all i get is more questions, my friend logic seems to have deserted me, as i cannot come up with a plausible reason for my current state. i feel like i am walking in a thunderstorm wearing a raincoat that has no buttons, so though i have several possible answers to my questions, none of my answers can fully protect me from the rain of questions assailing my mind.

the one comfort i have however is time, like a drunk in a bar, my pain and dissatisfaction is dulled by each successive turn of the glass( hour for me, vodka for the drunk).

in the perfect world that exists only in my head i am all alone, as all the chinks my present armour are brought about by the people i allowed to get close enough to be welded into my armour.

i am not sure i was able to make any sense in todays post but i swear, this is unaldulterated, straight from my oh so befuddled mind.